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Saturday, November 07, 2009, 11:41 am
I came to church when i was sec3.. i was invited by my sister.. yea.. for the first time in service.. i dun reali know.. what i felt.. but... i came back almost everyweek for service..I had some small changes in my life..but.. they are not big.. i have problems here and there... i dun pray.. i dun do QT.. i just go to church.. spent time... waste time..yea.. thou i was in church.. there is still somethings tat i long for.. i had not reali invited Chirst into mi.. and i just day by day... say i'll Qt.. but ending up i didn't.. Yea.. tat.. happened for awhile.. and nothing change.. i was thinking tat.. kk i go to church.. if i die.. i'm going to heaven.. its good already... but.. later as i walk down more in church.. i realise.. tats not wad God reali wan mi to do.. So..after my N lvls.. i didnt do well.. and can't make it back for sec5.. i was quite depressed.. and gave up on myself.. blaming myself for everything.. then.. i soon started to back slide... i stop serving.. i was taken out of usher..but.. thanks to the friends who were there.. ShiPei and John.. who is always trying to talk to mi.. asking mi to come back to church.. So.. it was RedRain.... i ask ShiPei.. to come and fetch mi.. and she did.. so i went for Red Rain.. on tat tat.. i met a new gurl... which.. came when i was didnt come in church... she caught my eye.. and.. i tried to get to know her.. and soon.. we kinda got together.. but.. i didn't wan people to think tat.. i onli come to church because of her.. so.. i tried to prove it to people.. who i think tat might have tat thought in mind..after tat.. mi and her got along quite long.. and i was attending church every week.. but.. my relation with God.. is onli..... like tat.. veri distant.. one day.. tat gurl left mi... i got quite depress... cause i thought tat she was the last i will have.. so.. i threw myself to God.. doing small prayers.. when i'm super super down.. and praising him and worshiping just to take away the pain tat i had in my heart... soon.. after awhile.. my emtion.. was better.. but.. i still hunger for her... and.. i stop praying... this when on for like 5 month.. i was still .... emoing... always thinking abt her.. so.. during october... i started going alittle " crazy".. i was hearing alot of voices in my head.. i was unsure abt myself.. i heard.. the right thing to do.. and i heard what is the wrong thing to do.. and i heard myself .... ingore or this.. you are who u are.. just be content.. then.. these thought reali keep going in and out of my mind.. tat idk wad to do.. tat i asked Val and JingFen what is happen to mi.. and what i should do.. and Jingfen.. ask mi to pray.. and tok to the leaders...I didnt reali tok to my leader.. because i was ashamed of wad happen..During one serivce.. Pst kong.. preach about what to do.. when u dun know.. wad to do.. So.. during the october period... there was Cg.. and i decided to go.. and.. JieRu prayed for mi.. welcoming mi back to the CG.. coming back to God.. but.. i wasn't reali back..then.. i rmbed one service.. veri clearly.. as the service start.. a question hit mi... When are u really coming back to mi?.. i was stun when i heard this question in my mind.. i was wondering.. was wrong.. y got this question.. as the service goes on.. i began to understand the question.. and knew tat it was God asking mi.. I was always in church.. always there.. but.. spiritually.. i was veri far away from him.. God asked mi when i'm reali coming back to him.. he not onli wanted my heart.. but he wan my everything.. to go to him.. then.. i began to hear tat... i can do great things with him in mi.. and all i need to do.. is to invited him into my life.. and trust him.. and have faith.. pray.. and build a relationship.. with him.. sliding back to him.. so.. i told jingfen about.. what i heard.. and the next thing i knew.. i went for Cg... and Jieru prayed for mi.. again.. I felt so blessed.. lolz.. i went to two CG.. and got prayed for for both CGs... that day.. i made a decision.. tat.. i will come into God... slide back into him.. and nothing is doing to stand in front of mi to block mi from growing more into Chirst.. for its in mi.. from tat day on.. i start doing my QT.. start praying.. i pray when ever i'm free.. on the train.. going to school.. and.. everytime.. i done it.. i felt so recharged.. and ready to fight the spiritual war.. but.. tats not the end of it.. as i had reali long for the presence of God.. on the service on 31 october.. once the service started.. i felt.. a gust of happiness going into mi.. and all my fears gone away... nothing but happyniess.. on the spot i knew.. its the promise of God.. coming.. i was super happy.. and.. was super hyper after service.. but tats not the end of it.. i was blessed and recharged ... and.. i knew tat.. God.. is doing wad he promise when.. i made tat small little choice.. inviting him.. and everyday.. i pray.. and worship him.. drawing myself closer to him.. :)..Woo... and now... i brought my cousin to CCH...and.. more have yet to come..Now everyweek.. i go for service.. and enjoyed the presence of God.. and be overwhelmed by his love.. this is my testi :).. Hope u guys like it... Labels: For more have yet to come. |
thedeceptionist
Vanity isn't a sin, a little narcissm wouldn't hurt.18 November 1992 hichewy@hotmail.com a hot lover of Christ |
partnersincrime
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