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Saturday, August 29, 2009, 10:11 am
I reali do... Failing again.... feeling the same thing.... Today... during service... i had a lot of thoughts...feelings... and........ I felt the happiness my sister had... when i got saved... Den... i hunger to get the feeling of someone close to mi saved. I was... happy... but... i was sad... I blame myself for not praying hard enough... Not trying hard enough to get my cousin to come... Not toking to her more... I wan to let the whole know... how my church is like... But.... i'm always pulled down... Today... was a veri good chance... to show my cousin... Tat my church is such a nice place.. to be in... Sadly... she simply dun wan to come.. If i have done more... she might have get saved... Its... all my fault... Thinking abt this... breaks my heart.... I found myself... lost for so long.... I lost myself... Thinking back... abt how.. great i can be... how good spiritually i can be.. I lost it all... I lost the word of life in my mouth... Its lost... I wan them back!.. Ain't letting go away from mi... I believe... with them.... i'll get more people save... doing wad i need to do.. building the church. I'm dry.... Idk wad to say... But... i was happy outside... sad in the inside... Stubborn mi... Broken Hearted i'm.. Need more faith.... more more... bigger bigger... Came to realise tat i have lost alot of faith... In terms of spiritually and other things... You... brought mi faith making mi think... i will nv lose in it ever again... But.. you... was also the one who took them away... Bringing mi back to sq1... Some questions.. to ask... tongue tied... and... Even if asked... or... something changes.... Its going to be the same.. i guess.. Idk wad to say.. |
thedeceptionist
Vanity isn't a sin, a little narcissm wouldn't hurt.18 November 1992 hichewy@hotmail.com a hot lover of Christ |
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theventingmachine
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