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Saturday, July 18, 2009, 10:21 am
Val and shi pei asked mi to go... Haha... Convinced by Val.. i went.. So crappy.. it like i go to church onli when people convince mi to go. Haiz... I was super moody.. super tired... Can't believe i gave the ushers so much of a dao face.. And.. had to give fake smiles to entertain.. Haiz.. Seriously.. i had been thinking... the reason tat u left mi is abit.... something i cant take it.. idk y.. Everything looks well for mi.. The thing was so overnite... it was same as last time.. I reali dun noe wad to react.. when u tell mi.. tat.. Till now... many doubts have not been cleared to mi yet. I wonder y can't we work things out.. Since u said.. u like to be with mi.. I made u happy.. I made u 4gt abt yr ex. U made mi realise alot of new things... I know i'm stupid saying all this... as u already made yr mind.. not to come back again.. I'll try to respect yr desicion,i can't promise u tat.. cuase i noe.. somehow.. i will break it. I just didn't noe wad to do.. I didn;t expect it coming at all.. Though tat this will be the last time i ever get into one relationship.. Just nothing is everlasting... During service.. i was thinking abt a few choice to make... Well... have thought of them on the way to church.. I dun noe y u wanna leave mi... A level's.?? Or... u dun love mi.. w/e... Yea.. now u already dun love mi anymore... Tats kinda.. saddening.. Today... when our eyes first met.. U gave everything out... Yr eyes.... i saw them... it was like.. hey.. look.. novel is here.. hope his ok.. Den i looked away... just dun noe wad to do.. U are making it so hard for mi.. maybe u... idk.. I'll just say.. cuase u are going to ignore mi anyway.. so it doesn't matter.. Yr exams are coming.. i'll be going to burden u... or w/e.. So.. one of the choice was... Me... leaving.. everything.. Walking out of yr life.. u wun ever get to c mi again..which is the running away term u said when we are 2gether.. Does it matter anyway..?.. its up to u to say... Mi leaving everything of yours will be the onli way i can peace down myself.. And let time heal mi.. Tat will be in 9 days time... Unless.. something happens... tat something... is something tat i wun expect.. Second choice... Is tat... u might have a chance to c mi.. but it will be rarely.. My existence in the CG will no longer be there.. But my existence in church will still be there.. So by luck.. u can c mi... but not for long. Thats my second choice... My third is..unrealistic.. Which is u coming back.. Maybe it can be real.. but the chances i see is low.. U noe.. i alway have the thought.. tat keeps mi going.. But actually i'm deciving myself.. It goes like this.. my mind always tell mi.. Hey.. its ok.. its going to be alright... She will come back to u after her A's... After tat... u and her can be 2gether again... and things will be the same... Haha.. funny rite?.. This whole post is today kinda post to tok to u.. Be it tat u will be reading or not.. Or will u reply or not.. Guess u wun... U dun wanna give mi.. not even a slim chance of thinking tat u will come back to mi.. Today.. when i saw yr side view... My eyes and brain.. worked like a camera... Took yr face down.. and its still in my brain.. U will alway be in my heart.. My mind is all made up for the first choice... I have already thought wad will be your reaction.. But.. does it matters..?... tat all i have to say... Whether u read it or not.. it doesn't matter. Labels: Gone soon |
thedeceptionist
Vanity isn't a sin, a little narcissm wouldn't hurt.18 November 1992 hichewy@hotmail.com a hot lover of Christ |
partnersincrime
A Aerina B Belle C Cheeyong G Grab R Ranford Rebecca Regina S Seeyin J Jaslin Jasmine Joey Jasmine X XiaoYing XiaoTing wheni'mgone
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theventingmachine
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